as i was washing my wine glass in the sink at 2:45 in the morning after drinking cheap wine and watching sex in the city i felt the sudden urge to pound at the punching bag hanging in my backyard. it made me think of tennis practice when i used to smack the tennis balls as hard as i could when i was angry, frustrated, or irked. the force of your arm, the way the ball made a popping sound as it hit the strings on the racket, broken synthetic strings later, it just made you feel a bit better. i miss it.

sometimes when you're feeling a certain way, do you find that when you watch tv or a movie that there's just this one character that suddenly goes through exactly what you're feeling at that exact moment? it always happens like that. it's sort of freaky.

if i had a hundred dollars right now i'd blow it on candles. scented candles, candlesticks, candle holders, thick candles, tea lights, the works. you never know, the right moment to light your entire candle collection might just come up.

van gogh's cafe de nuit. quynh bought and framed a poster of it for me for my 18th birthday. i remembered feeling so happy when she presented it to me because she had remembered it was one of my favorite pieces. something about the colors, the swirls of blue and yellow, and the cafe that got to me. it's been awhile since i've sat and just stared at it. it's a welcoming feeling, like seeing an old friend.

flowers are a waste of money but oh how i wish i had a gorgeous bouquet of orchids sitting next to me. that or fire and ice roses. or that peach-ish orange color roses. scratch that. i still love flowers.